|Go ahead. Make my day.|
I know, I know.
Make me feel like a perv.
But it looks like I got my cover shot for 'Two on One,' which is due out any day now but I would have to check my calendar.
It's like waving a fucking steak around in front of a drowning man.
(Can you talk to me later, ladies? Like when I got money and stuff?)
I'm just kidding ladies and gentlemen, I joke, I joke.
But this is the worst fricking job in the world sometimes, I really mean that.
Here we got signed model releases and everything, which looks good for me and all that, but it would be, ah, sort of unethical for one such as I to call them ladies up and sort of ask for a date, right?
God, would someone please come around here and kill me or something.
Holy shit, you could say I was feeling my oats. And my inadequacies.
The whole point of this is that my short story, ah, what the hell is it called. Oh, yeah. 'Two on One.' I forget what it's about. But it will be coming out soon. If you got a gun or something, that would be good.